Forgiveness and Healing

In today's world, so, so many things can destroy the Family. Pornography is a most despicable evil and literally tears families apart. Infidelity through pornography or through other means destroys and mocks the plan which God has for husbands and wives. Abuse demeans the sanctity of life and crushes innocent and tender hearts. These are only a few of the evils that the adversary promotes in our world today-all of which destroy lives and families. This is exactly what Satan wants.

When we lived with Heavenly Father before we came to Earth (see my post "What's the Big Deal?"), we were taught that life on Earth would be hard. We knew that we would face trials, because personal agency would allow us to make our own choices. Some of these trials would be caused by things out of our control, some would be caused by our own actions, and some would be caused by the actions of others. Although we knew that heartache was inevitable here on Earth, we still decided to come; we knew that receiving a body and living mortal life was essential for our salvation and progression. 

Family life is meant to be the happiest setting we can possibly experience here on Earth. And this pure happiness is possible, through the keeping of the commandments and through the keeping of covenants. But unfortunately, because families are made up of imperfect people, sadness will occur. Some of this sadness may come through outside means, such as accidents or illness. But other sadness may come from the unrighteous choices of family members. 

The Family: A Proclamation to the World (para. 8) says: "Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities."

Repentance and forgiveness in family life is so essential to the well-being of a family. Because every member of a family is imperfect and full of mistakes, they only way for true healing to happen is through the power of forgiveness, which only comes through the power of the Atonement.

For more information on the happiness that can be achieved in family life, visit https://www.lds.org/topics/family/happiness?lang=eng.

Promoting the Welfare of the Family

I know that some of the things I am going to say here will be offensive to some readers. But as a Certified Family Life Educator-in-training, I cannot keep quiet about these things. And I want readers to keep in mind that everything I say (throughout this whole blog) is not only based on my beliefs as a Latter-day Saint, but also as someone who is studying Family Life from a psychological and sociological point of view.

As a Latter-day Saint, I have a duty to uphold the Family as the "fundamental unit of society" (The Family: A Proclamation to the World). There are a lot of different "hot topics" in politics right now, but no matter the issue, I have to take a stand for the sake of the Family. 

Based on all that we have learned this semester, I think I can conclude that most of the issues circulating through our society right now stem from selfishness, over-individualism, and self-pursuit. In today's culture, we are taught that the most important person is ME. Whatever makes ME happy, fulfilled, and successful, is what I should aim for. Our society, as a whole, has completely lost its focus on families and morality. Whether the issue is gay marriage, elective abortion, declining birth rates, or pornography, the root of the issue is always selfishness. It is not encouraged in today's society to think about others before ourselves. A woman is not encouraged to use her womanhood in marriage and motherhood. A man is not encouraged to focus on his children before his career. And married couples can easily "get out" of an unhappy marriage if the relationship is not gratifying for one or both partners. 

Thankfully, in our church, we have knowledge of the Plan of Salvation. We know that families are central to Heavenly Father's plan; we know that marriage is sacred and crucial; we know that every single life is precious and should be protected and nurtured. It is Satan's plan to thwart the Plan of Salvation as best he can, by encouraging selfishness in people, because selfishness destroys families. 

It is my duty to protect and sanctify the family unit. The best way for me to do this is by protecting and sanctifying my own family. It is also my duty however, to promote measures, laws, and rights which encourage healthy family relationships. As a citizen, I can vote for laws that benefit children, parents, and spouses. I can also vote against measures that go against Proclamation principles (such as gay marriage and elective abortion). 

More on Fatherhood

This is one of the best ideas I've ever heard about... a website completely dedicated to fatherhood! Please check it out! "Fatherlessness is a growing crises in America, one that undergirds many of the challenges families are facing" (The President's Fatherhood Pledge).
www.fatherhood.gov

If you are a father, you can take the President's pledge and commit to being the best dad you can be!
https://www.fatherhood.gov/pledge

Relationship Advice

Check out these awesome websites! The first one has a ton of great relationship advice, whether you're dating around, in a committed relationship, engaged, married, or in the parenting phase!

The second one is the website of the National Healthy Marriage Resource Center.

EDUCATE YOURSELF and enjoy a healthy, stable relationship!
www.twoofus.org
http://www.healthymarriageinfo.org/index.aspx

Learn more about the Family!

Family Values (The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints)

http://www.mormon.org/values/family

Work, Work, Work!

As a stay-at-home mom, the home can sometimes feel like a cage, if I’m being completely honest. Don’t get me wrong- I LOVE being able to stay home my son, and I am grateful to have the house as my domain. But all of the dishes, laundry, cleaning, etc. CAN get pretty tedious. However, I never really realized how important work is for a family until getting married myself. How would we survive if both my husband and I worked equally hard to run the home? We wouldn’t survive! Or at least, we’d be living in a pigsty!

Growing up, my mom didn’t give me a lot of responsibility around the house, aside from the basic room-cleaning or dish-clearing. I don’t think I ever fully cleaned a bathroom until I got to college! Part of this was because my mother is a VERY clean person, but part of this was also because it stressed her out to teach us kids how to do things that she could just do herself!

A few weeks ago in my Family class, we discussed the importance of work within a family. In an article titled “Family Work”, Kathleen Slaugh Bahr and Cheri A. Loveless explain that in today’s world, the value of work is underappreciated, particularly in the family/home setting:

“Even the purpose of family work was given a facelift. Once performed to nurture and care for one another, it was reduced to "housework" and was done to create "atmosphere." Since work in the home had "use value" instead of "exchange value," it remained outside the market economy and its worth became invisible. Being a mother now meant spending long hours at a type of work that society said mattered little and should be "managed" to take no time at all.

Prior to modernization, children shared much of the hard work, laboring alongside their fathers and mothers in the house and on the farm or in a family business. This work was considered good for them--part of their education for adulthood. Children were expected to learn all things necessary for a good life by precept and example, and it was assumed that the lives of the adults surrounding them would be worthy of imitation.”

Parents have the responsibility of teaching their children how to work hard (The Family: A Proclamation to the World, para. 8).

Since Adam and Eve left the Garden of Eden and were commanded to work for their livelihood, humankind became a race of working beings. We are made to work! (Bahr, Manwaring, Loveless, & Bailey Bahr, 2012).

Running a home is not supposed to be a one-man (or woman) show. Spouses should work together, involving their children, to keep the family home running smoothly. And it IS important to keep a home running smoothly. In Successful Marriages and Families, Bahr, Manwaring, Loveless, and Bailey Bahr described the term “housework” as something that “no one wants to do”. However, this very work is what can help bring families closer together. “The daily work of feeding, clothing, and sheltering others has the power to transform us spiritually as we transform others physically” (Bahr, Manwaring, Loveless, & Bailey Bahr, 2012).

It would do families a lot of good to work together in a common effort- as a team- to maintain and take care of the home. Family work is necessary work, and it shouldn’t be considered meaningless. 

Waiting for Dad

Waiting for Dad (Mormon Ads)